The vulcanologist manqué sitting next to you is pondering whether the volcano you are flying over can be classified—on the basis of its bowl shape and steepness—as a cinder cone. You have larger concerns. Those mini rift valleys on the verdant slopes suggest a scenario common to many developing lands where slash-and-burn farming is practiced: Precious View Website[topsoil] runs down to the sea in broad red streaks, as you'll see all along this nation's central plateau.

Although human encroachment caused most of the original forest and giant creatures to disappear, this country remains an evolutionary biologist's dream. So great is the biodiversity that it could be named the République Endémique. Some seven types of tree called Avenue of the Baobabs[Mother of the Forest] are found nowhere else on the continent but here (if you see one, stand on your head for a rightside-up perspective).

It is also home to a thousand unique orchid species, and just last winter, the botanical world was rocked by the discovery of a Tahina spectabilis[sixty-foot primordial palm] that blooms once a century… and then promptly perishes in a floral swan song, spent from the effort of growing a massive shoot and branches that nourish its hundreds of flowers. Dozens of chameleon species are peculiar to this environment. Other local critters are pop culture stars: Surely you remember the recent
Madagascar[animated film] that featured mammals who like to move it, move it to a dance hit sung in pseudo patois by everyone's favorite Sacha Baron Cohen (a.k.a. Borat) [faux Kazakh].

Having settled here less than two thousand years ago, humans are relative newcomers. A hodgepodge of ethnicities, their descendants share polysyllabic Hawaiian-length surnames whose rhythmic vowels are euphonious enough that you could write a cantata from the phone book alone.

An Italian explorer claimed the nation was "inhabited by Saracens, governed by foure old men." Ahem, Mr. Polo, you never passed anywhere near here. Today, a handsome President Marc
Ravalomanana[former yogurt salesman] is in charge. Let's hope he can tame a sapphire rush that threatens to exacerbate the erosion problem. Perhaps this land can take a cue from a View Website [beloved long-tailed primate]—another of its gems—and find balance in the end.

Where are you, anyhow?