Early in the last century a Alfred Viscount Northcliffe[viscount] wrote that this city "illuminated . . . is wonderful. Imagine a giant Monte Carlo with a hundred times as many lights." He was prescient. Today, the town is a thousand times brighter, and laser light shows like the one you're enjoying are a nightly spectacle-the pyrotechnics an occasional bonus.
A Chinese New Year[bash in February] will make these fireworks look like sparklers at a Fourth of July backyard barbecue.

You are joyriding on one of the Star Ferry[myriad ferries] and hydrofoils that crisscross this Victoria Harbour[great harbor] like so many paddles of ducks on a pond-an apt metaphor considering that most visitors have a fowl experience here (with some even taking a Dim sum. Apologies for the pun![dim view of the savory cuisine]).

The Kowloon[district behind you] is a stepchild of the glittering one before you, which a Lord Palmerston[mid-nineteenth-century lord] called "a barren Island with hardly a House upon it" (not so prescient, that guy). The vertiginous cityscape was drafted by a I.M Pei, César Pelli, Norman
Foster[who's who of international architects], whereas the larger territory spreads out in a geographic jumble of islands and channels, inlets and peninsulas, that will call to mind Rorschach's inkblots when you fly over it.

For entertainment, join the punters at the Happy Valley and Sha Tin[horse races], or catch a performance by one of the Cantopop[caterwauling, synthesized pop singers] (second only to kick-ass movie stars in popularity in these parts). With Latin dance all the rage here these days, stick around for the salsa festival next month, and ask about the lady who just sued her dance instructor to recoup the eight-million-dollar fee she paid him.

You're visiting a land of luxe and of contradictions, where skytrams and Mid-Level Escalators[endless escalators] are public transport but seventy percent of the region remains blessedly undeveloped. Indeed, you can hike in twenty-three parks and visit wetlands, Cheung Chau[car-free islands], and some forty beaches. The Lantau[largest island] hosts a new Chek Lap Kok[high-tech airport] and a Disneyland[theme park] yet has a peak where many seek a Po Lin Monastery[path to enlightenment].

You won't have to look hard to find historic gems such as gas lamps and a Western Market[refurbished redbrick market] tucked away in the shadows of these glitzy edifices. And that clacking sound you hear as you wander? It's double-decker trams trundling along streets with quaint Victorian names. Step into one of the Mahjong[popular smoky game parlors] if you want to ring in the new year with a real bang.

Where are you, anyhow?